• Break the Taboo Malta

Story 15 – 01.04.2019




“I had an abortion when I was 23. I was trying to establish my career and was still studying. I had just bought a place of my own and was at my lowest financially.

I met this guy I knew at a party. We used to date the previous year, and it ended up with us having a one-night stand. Later I got to know he was in a relationship and his partner was expecting a baby.

Fast forward a month later and I found out I was pregnant. I knew that I wanted no ties with this person. For me there was never a question of keeping the baby. Thankfully I had a very supportive friend who helped all the way even though she did not agree with my decision. We booked an appointment at a very professional clinic in London and it was over and done with.

The guy paid for the expenses of both of us for a week in London. I did not want to raise suspicion and go for just two days. The procedure was not at all painful and I do not have regrets. After the operation, we spent the rest of the day shopping.

I felt relieved that my life will not be doomed. If it was a different guy, even though I was young, probably I would have had the baby. But being bound to a person who was unfaithful when his partner was expecting a baby did not fit into my image of a lifetime partner.

Now I am in a very good place career wise, happily married and God has blessed me with three beautiful kids, who I love to death. Just wanted to share my experience. I am forever grateful to my friend as without her it would have been much too overwhelming to do on my own. Women have the right to make their own choices. Before this happened to me, I would have probably said that I am against abortion except for in rape cases or when the mother's life is in danger. However, when you are actually in the situation, it is a different story. Probably if I had this baby, I would never have had any financial support from this guy because he made it 100% clear that he will stay with his current partner. I had just bought my own place, was working full time, and had another two years to complete my studies. My dad had just fallen ill, and my mother had to stop working to take care of him. In those days there was no paid childcare. I would have had to stop working to take care of a baby and probably would have never managed to complete my studies. My decision would have had an impact on the other baby of his partner. It is a difficult place to be. I always wanted to have a family. My parents, though they struggled financially, always had my education as their number one priority. The idea of failing them, having a baby on my own and being a burden on my own family was killing me. I do not expect everyone to understand. However, I'm not really bothered with the judgments because it was the best decision in the circumstances. As I said, I don't have regrets.”

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Break the Taboo Malta is an initiative to end abortion stigma in Malta by sharing real abortion stories and experiences.